Someone who lost everything...
Slowly trying to find back what has been lost....
!~!~!!!THE OPEN CONVERSATION!!!~!~!
Friday, June 23, 2006
The 9th...
woke up around 5pm for dinner... check my mails and friendster... and suddenly she came into my mind... hmmm... wondering how she is doing... went for a smoke and eventually called her for awhile... 20 mins we chatted... so inbetween i actually ask her about her bf and stuff... know wat guys...? she say that it was just that guy saying they were attached... lolz... she say she heaven decide whether to go with him anot... wat a joke... feel kinda relieve at first thinking i might have a chance again... but WTH... i decided to let go everything after i took a walk alone this morning 5am... threw away the ring i bought with her.. and the keychain that is imprint with our nice-est photo... deleted away all ours photos... made up my mind le... then have to be confused again for she gave me the slightest chance...
went out to meet You Fu again at AMK watching scoccer halfway... came the msg...
Hers.... and mine...
" I know you will be hating me alot now. But i really cannot forget you that easily because you are special.I'M sorry"
So i actually replied... feeling lost and Soft-hearted...
"I'm sorry too... but things are totally different... you have your world and i have mine... you have your new guy and i have none... sorry"
"I don have... i didn't decide yet... i wan to use him to forget you but found to be wrong... i keep busying with school and friend... i wan to forget everything... i didn't even meet him for so long le... sorry..."
"if you heavn't decided yet... it means you have liked him... so i would say all the best... its useless when you are with me thinking of others..."
"Used to like him for 2 weeks... now fading... haiz... hate myself alot... anyway wish ya all the best... ya happy can liaoz..."
"there are too many things insdie me which i am in doubt... but i will nv ask cos i will nv know the truth..."
"I'm sorry for everything but i know one thing for sure... i still love you... miss ya take care..."
SOOoo... should i be with her again...? or should i be heartless to leave everything aside...? haiz... i fear of everything...
Finish soccer then went home... now blogging after checking my stuffs again... i wish to be with ya again... but there are still many things left undone... maybe we can start off afresh by being friends again... leaving options till later date... and most of all... better finish everything else clean like that guy before we proceed... i don wan later ppl say i "childish and lame"... i shall forgive them for they are still young... haha...
signing off...
THE
OPEN GUY
KENNY HO JIA HUI.
NINI.AH-GU.
21-JAN-1986
SINGLE (:
free-thinker
STUDENT of Temasek Polytechnic
(Info-Communications)
kamlzeelf86@hotmail.com
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